Weird Night Out: Times Square
Updated: June 29, 2009
Why would an otherwise reasonable Citysearch editor spend a night out in Times Square? Am I a masochist? Do I harbor a secret love for the Olive Garden? Am I distracted by bright, shiny things? No, no and yes. But I really just wanted to see if it was possible to have a fun time in New York's most avoided (by New Yorkers, anyway) neighborhood by checking out some of the more well-known tourist spots as well as dropping into whatever relatively under-the-radar joints looked appealing. Read on for the good, the bad and the overpriced from a night out in NYC's tourist hell.
Times Square Destinations
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Hawaiian Tropic Zone
Read Reviews729 7th Ave, New York, NY 10019 (map)
"I want to go college but it's too expensive," I overheard the hostess say, causing me to ruminate on an economy that not only denies our young women a chance at an education but also, evidently, sufficient clothing to wear to work. Yes, this is Hawaiian Tropic Zone, where visiting businessmen gather to pay homage to our nation's finest line of skincare products. Oh, and also to ogle girls in bikinis. Booze is booze, however, and the cheesy decor (complete with TVs running a Hawaiian Tropic, um, "beauty pageant" on a constant loop) inspired a hypothetical trip to Vegas where, conveniently enough, there is also a Hawaiian Tropic Zone.
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Jimmie's Corner
Read Reviews140 W 44th St, New York, NY 10036 (map)
Walking into Jimmy's Corner made me feel all warm and fuzzy, like when former foes Apollo Creed and Rocky Balboa teamed up to defeat Mr. T in "Rocky III." The bar, owned by former boxer and trainer Jimmy Glen, is all classic boxing posters and memorabilia, a huge relief after suffering through the neighborhood's tourist traps. A warm atmosphere, a clientele not entirely made up of tourists and a jukebox jumping with old-school soul classics made this my favorite stop of the night.
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New York Marriott Marquis Times Square
Read Reviews1535 Broadway, New York, NY 10036 (map)
Did you know the Marriot Times Square has the city's only rotating rooftop lounge? It's true! Drinking at The View is like being on the world's most boring carousel, except that it's 48 stories high and there is a $7 cover charge. It's all here folks: $19 cocktails featuring Malibu rum, a soundtrack only Kenny G could love and even a grotesque chocolate fountain bubbling on the buffet table. My party and I would have left right away except we didn't see the waitress for an hour--which also happens to be the exact amount of time it takes for the restaurant to make a full rotation.
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Pig 'n' Whistle
Read Reviews165 W 47th St, New York, NY 10036 (map)
A touristy take on an Irish pub, this local mini-chain provided the requisite number of giant TVs and the obscene food portions to suit American tastes. Still, it wasn't too offensive. Eating the pub grub (shepherd's pie, turkey clubs, etc.) was a boring yet oddly comforting experience, like hugging my grandma. Side note: Hanging out in Times Square was like being trapped in my own personal Top 40 hell, where the only music that exists is from American Idol. David Cook's syrupy love ballad haunts my nightmares to this day.
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Sapporo
Read Reviews152 W 49TH St, New York, NY 10019 (map)
Sure, Sapporo isn't exactly four-star dining, but it ain't the Olive Garden either, which automatically puts it in the 95th percentile of Times Square restaurants. This is a solid, inexpensive Japanese ramen house, with bowls of ramen selling for $7.50 and 16 oz. Sapporo beers for $5, which is probably why the place was absolutely packed at 7pm. The food, however, did arrive at our table with suspect promptness, leading me to believe the kitchen either didn't prepare everything fresh or the cooks had one of those time-freezing watches from "The Twilight Zone," although that would have ostensibly led to better ramen.
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