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Where the Real Schmucks Dine

I love the concept behind the new movie "Dinner for Schmucks," but I'm not inclined to invite any more foolish, obnoxious, generally contemptible people to my house than I already do. Luckily, there are lots of New York restaurants that already host unofficial dinners for schmucks every night. Here are five of them. (Photo: Steve Carell is the ultimate schmuck in Paramount Pictures' "Dinner for Schmucks.")

Updated: August 05, 2010

Schmucked Up in New York

35.5
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Stk

26 Little W 12th Street, New York, NY 10014

You know who I bet likes this Meatpacking District club-staurant? Snooki. Need I say more? Just in case, let me sum it up thus: Every dish at STK is served with a whopping side of twice-baked fist-pumps.

33.5
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Kenmare

98 Kenmare St, New York, NY 10012

There are many reasons to go to Kenmare, but all of them take place in the basement lounge, long after the dinner hour has ended. If you're coming here to eat, you're doing it wrong.

43.0
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Bubba Gump

1501 Broadway, New York, NY 10036

Sure, this Times Square mega-resto automatically has one strike against it due to its location. But apparently Bubba Gump is not only inspired by "Forrest Gump"; he's also the chef.

31.5
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Chinatown Brasserie

380 Lafayette St, New York, NY 10003

The food at Chinatown Brasserie isn't bad, but the bottom line is you're a moron if you think $10 dumplings in Noho are better than 25 cent dumplings in Chinatown.

45.5
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Beaumarchais Brasserie

409 W 13th St, New York, NY 10014

Sorry, Bagatelle, but if we wanted Saturday brunch to involve Eurotrash spraying bottles of Champagne and dancing on tables like it's "Girls Gone Wild," we'd ... Oh, wait, we'd never want that. At least not if we had to pay for it.